The Finnish film Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale may be the first to feature naked old men wrinkledly galumphing through the tundra while a little boy frantically begs for his dad to save his life by giving him a spanking. Expanding on a series of internet shorts, director Jalmari Helander strikes a fine balance between creepy and darkly comic, delivering a sharply askew Home Alone riff goosed by brief bits of more traditional horror splatter. While the pace does occasionally falter, even at 80 minutes, Rare Exports is ultimately a spooky, funny, weirdly heartwarming fable that—were it not for the aforementioned glimpses of non-CGIed geriatric bits—might actually be suitable for kids of all ages. Practice your eye-covering, parents. by Andrew Wright