For one day each year, that one Holiday Inn by the airport is home to even more snakes, lizards, and rats than usual! It’s all thanks to the Portland Metro Reptile Expo, which goes down right across the parking lot at the Columbia Conference Center, and features every kind of cold-blooded, dead-eyed abomination of nature that you can imagine—and many of them are for sale! Featuring vendors like Ivy’s Axolotls, Bigfoot Exotics, and the exceedingly well-named ball python breeding company Girls with Balls Pythons and More, the Reptile Expo is the place to get a bunch of soulless, horrifying, impossible-to-care-for creatures that will feel nothing at all when they inevitably turn on you and brutally squeeze the life from your writhing body. Admission is only $10, and kids get in for half that, and probably won’t be eaten.