When I first saw Desperately Seeking Susan sometime in the early 90s, as a bright-eyed, innocent 10 year old, I saw it as a how-to guide for becoming as cool as its star, Madonna. Rosanna Arquette is Roberta Glass, just "a housewife from Fort Lee, New Jersey" and Madonna is Susan, a rock 'n' roll babe who doesn't give a fuck. When Glass gets mistaken for Susan and, after a moped accident, comes to believe she is Susan, the movie (directed by Susan Seidelman!) becomes an antics-filled romp, but also a playbook on living your best life, Madonna style. Steal! Be friends with magician's assistants! Sleep with a young hairy and hunky Aiden Quinn! Wear a lot of jewelry! No, even more jewelry! Go to jail! Get caught up in a mobster's murder! Make friends while you solve crimes! If you're feeling stuck in life, like a plain Jane housewife from New Jersey, head down to Grand Illusion to see this perfect 80s time capsule in all its 35 mm glory to be reminded that you can be whoever the fuck you want to be. by Megan Seling