Samwise Gamgee and Thanos ask Short Round, a chubby exhibitionist, and a bad Michael Jackson impersonator to join them on a treasure hunt on the Oregon coast, where Joey Pants and the FBI dickhead from Die Hard are illegally detaining an ex-football player with encephalitis. Will this motley gang of misfits find Captain Dick Joke’s secret stash of gold coins? Will everyone speak solely in perforated shrieks and yelps? Will you start to wish you were just playing the old NES game again instead of sitting through your 50th viewing of this tired nostalgia exercise that constitutes roughly 17 percent of Astoria’s economy? Hah! C’mon. Goonies never say die, right? It’s our time down here!
by Bobby Roberts
EverOut lists are a great tool for crafting weekend itineraries, curating restaurant recommendations for your out-of-town friends, and so much more! Endlessly customizable, you can mix and match events, locations, and articles, or keep them separate. You can even invite your friends to contribute to your lists!
New lists are private and visible only to you. You can change this any time.
Or add to your existing lists:
Say something about this item. If you add it to multiple lists, the note will be added to all lists. You can always change it later!
is now on these lists:
Whoop! We ran into a problem. Please try again later.